If you're with your partner for quite a long time you've probably had the chance to meet his family. That's usually sweet because it evaluates the seriousness of your relationship. But what if you dislike the partner's family? This is not very uncommon, actually. We can't get along with everyone, and it's okay if you don't want to be around the people you don't fancy that much. Women usually tell things such as "I don't like my boyfriend's family", only to their friends, while doing nothing about it. But what if I told you that you can actually improve the current situation? Here are nine things you should do if you don't like your partner's family.
1. Talk to your partner sincerely
Don't rush with this kind of statement, though. Get to know his family a bit better, and if you still dislike them, you should admit it to your partner. This is important because you will be able to avoid any unpleasant situations if he knows about it. Maybe they won't call you on some unimportant family meetings, or they will be able to help you limit the contact with them. They have to understand because it's not your fault. We can't choose who we like or dislike. Also, if your partner doesn't know about it, they might not be able to grasp why you change the way you behave around his family and relatives. All in all, they have to know, no matter what.
2. Smile more
This is a great disguise, actually. They will never be able to read you and know how you truly feel. Also, it's true that smiling can actually improve our mood, and you will need it in situations where you have to spend time with his family.
3. Hold your ground
The remarks which come from their family can be of all kinds, but you should know how to handle the situation. Whoever likes to mock you when you're around, thinking that you won't be able to do anything about it, subtly imply that you won't tolerate such behavior, even if they are the members of your partner's family. You should always defend yourself, but you should also be careful. Sometimes, you will have to stay quiet, because you might make a problem both for you and your partner. If they are sarcastic, for example, you can be, too. Just try not to be obvious.
4. Avoid the members of his family if you can
The best option for you is to simply not be around his family if that's possible. You can skip the family gathering, your partner can sleep at your place, and so on. There are many ways to avoid his family in a way so they don't get that you don't actually like them.
5. Treat them distantly and politely
Never forget that politeness is the key to parents' hearts. It's better for you if they like you, even if you don't like them. Also, they are your partner's parents, so show some respect by treating them as politely as you can, while keeping your distance. Don't ask too many questions, but answer every question they ask you. Also, they can literally do no harm to you if you're always nice and kind. That will be your shield in situations of possible conflict. Never quarrel with his family, because if you get to be on bad terms with only one member of their family, they might bad-mouth you.
6. Don't complain in front of your partner
If you do this, they will probably feel guilty. In fact, it's best if you don't complain at all. It's completely futile and unnecessary. Like I've already said, try to avoid any kind of conflict.
7. Limit the contact and don't talk about yourself too much
If the first thing that comes in your mind when you talk with your partner's family members is "I don't like my girlfriend's family" or something similar, well, you'll have to limit the contact with them. Don't give them your phone number or follow them on social media platforms. Also, it would be good if they know less information about you. The reason for this is simple; they will ask you fewer questions regarding your exams, work, health, and so on. Ask your partner not to share your mobile phone number with them, as well. For some reason, parents (especially mothers) often ask for a phone number. In order to prevent that, just ask your partner to think something up and avoid providing it to them.
8. Never put your partner in the middle
Remember this. Never make your partner choose sides. Don't even get into this kind of situation. But if it's too late, for example, and you've had a fight with his family, don't involve them in that mess. They most likely have nothing to do with it. You have to understand that your partner can't choose what kind of family they will be a part of. I know a lot of women who claim something like "I don't like my boyfriend's family" and expect him to be on their side. Don't be mad if your boyfriend doesn't want to be involved in the fight. It doesn't have to mean that he's weak. Don't forget that it is his parents who raised him and helped him become who he is now.
9. Show your manners
Even if someone scoffs at you, you should never react abruptly. Also, choose your words wisely and don't show signs of frustration. Try not to get irritated at all, if possible. That will make you an instant winner in such situations, and you will prove to them how polite you are by always showing your courtesy.
Summary
If you do not like your partner's parents, I feel really sorry for you. This indeed is a burden and an ungrateful situation, and you will need all the strength of this world to endure his family members' behavior. The reason for your dislike is not even important. It simply is how it is. I think you will find these nind pieces of advice useful because they can help you avoid so many difficult situations.