When you meet a person you feel passionately about, how do you know that they are actually the one for you? It's not always easy to be sure about the choices you make. Your heart may tell you one thing while your head tells you something else.
It's important to remember that life isn't always about your feelings. There are factors that must be present when starting and sustaining healthy relationships. Look out for the signs below which will tell you how to know if he is the one.
Everything might seem amazing between you and your new boyfriend now, but how do you know if things are only going to be good during the honeymoon stage? What if you and your boyfriend turn out to be a terrible match in the future?
There's no need to sit around agonizing over whether your new love will last. If you notice any of the signs or see any of the behaviors explained here, then you have indeed found the right guy for you.
1. You feel comfortable around him
So many of us are misled by the romantic movies we watch and the memes we see on social media. The reality is that too many butterflies and too much passion doesn't make for the best foundation for a stable relationship.
The truth is, the guy who is the most comfortable for you to be around is the guy for you. Do you find you always fall asleep when hanging out at his place? It's not because he's boring; it's because your heart feels comfortable when you're around him. It's a good sign that you would have a peaceful future together.
2. You can communicate without words
If you and your beloved can understand each other without speaking, then you just might be made for one another. If you both see something strange happen in a shop, the puzzled and amused glances you exchange mean you'll definitely have a laugh about it later. When your mom comes over and you dart a panicked look at him, he knows to hide the ashtray behind the sofa. Basically, you understand each other with little signals, looks, or grunts. You are in tune with each other and make the perfect pair.
3. You respect each other's independence
Don't think that you have to imitate those couples that go everywhere and do everything together to be a committed pair. It's actually healthier when you can respect each other's independence and appreciate the differences between the things you both enjoy doing. How do you know he's the one? You are happy for him when he goes out and has fun, and he's happy for you to enjoy yourself and hang out with your friends too!
4. You know how to argue healthily
You know you are in a toxic relationship if your arguments are frequent, petty, and hurtful. You'll know your guy is the one if you can argue kindly and fairly with him. He doesn't say spiteful or petty things, because he loves you and doesn't want to hurt you. He wants to find solutions to any issue that comes up, so he shows you patience and is willing to compromise or apologize if he is in the wrong. This is an important sign that indicates a solid relationship.
5. You have the same plan for future
If your conversations about the future don't clash, then it means you both want the same things in life. This is one of the necessary factors that must be considered without emotion. No matter how much you love him, if his dream is to be a hot air balloon pilot who sails around the world, unless your dream is to do the same, then you are destined to be apart most of the time.
Many women would not go into a relationship knowing that they will end up alone. If you see yourself with 3 children and a dog, and he wants to be carefree forever, you may never be happy together in the end. No one wants to be the reason their partner feels trapped in a life they never wanted. Having the same plan for the future is a deal breaker in the question of how to know if he's the one.
6. You trust each other
Trust is extremely important in healthy relationships. However, most people believe that trust is mainly about fidelity; it's more than that. You will know he's the one if you can trust that he will always have your best interest at heart.
You will need to trust that each of you would defend each other to your families or friends who dislike you. You have to trust each other that one of you won't spend your life savings on a skydiving course without your knowledge. A lasting relationship cannot be built without the kind of trust that makes you confident about who he is and what he's capable of.
7. He supports you in being your best
A good answer to the question of how to know if he is the one is that he supports you in becoming your best. If your man encourages you to take the driving exam or go back to school, then he is a guy that doesn't just care about you, he is invested in your future. Any guy that seems resentful of your efforts or mocks you when you're trying to improve yourself is displaying a red flag. He doesn't care about your future and is not the one for you.
8. He still cherishes you after a long time together
Let's say that you and your boyfriend have been together for a few years now, yet he still cherishes you. To cherish a woman means that she is protected and lovingly cared for. He'll look after you if you are ill, he'll try to get you the things you need, and always do things to keep you safe - even if it's just advice about traveling home safely at night.
If you still feel cared for and protected by your man, even after years of being in each others' lives, then he is the one for you.
9. He tries to make you happy
It's clear that some men will only be with you as long as it's benefiting him in some way, for example, he doesn't want to be lonely or he's simply looking for a bed buddy. But how to know if he is the one? His motivation should be to make you happy - whether it's him working hard so that he can provide you with the things that will make you happy or him staying in with you to watch the chick flicks you love so much.
His wanting to make you happy will be evident in the small things; he'll go the long way home to the store that sells the particular kind of drink you like. These are the actions of a man who is happy to be with you for the long haul.
10. You'll feel stronger
A man who gives you a deep, trusting, lasting love will make you feel strong. You know the man will do anything for you. You know you no longer have to face the world and all its challenges alone. It'll make you feel stronger than you ever felt when you were single or with a man that you couldn't see a future with.
The man will be more powerful and confident if he meets the right woman. He's not alone, he has a woman by his side to care for him, and he can raise a family with her. These factors are just as important to men as they are to women. These behaviors and feelings will be evident in a couple that are meant for one another.
Final Words
You have now learned how to know if he is the one; you will no longer be unsure about the guy you are with. Real lasting love does not begin the way it does in the movies. It's a quiet, comfortable, solid emotion that is felt not only as butterflies in the stomach but as an attachment from the soul.
If you have been lucky enough to find this kind of love, then you can rest assured that you have found "the one". If you have yet to experience these feelings or see these behaviors in the guy you're with, then just wait patiently for your time. Focus on making yourself the best version of a whole and complete you.
Know that the right guy will come along and enjoy all the love, peace, and comfort you have to give. Be happy and full of positive energy, and remember that the best things always come late.